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What do I do?
Saturday, September 1, 2012 • 5:11 PM • 0 comments It has happened at least 8 times, average of once a month.Can things be simpler? Can both of us stop wanting to leave? I believed there were good times, can we focus on them? God, please help us all through the uncertain times. Labels: 2012, boyfriend, God, happiness, love, relationships I could have.
Saturday, August 25, 2012 • 3:18 PM • 0 comments I could have posted about the hen's night last night or the supposedly last pageant as a Miss just a week ago or the upcoming renovation of my bedroom but I chose to share my sadness and confusion because this is my blog and this is a memory I would like to keep to remind myself all the troughs and peaks of this arduous relationship.I always knew I'm not a perfect person, never will be. I will never be perfect for anyone too and I'm not looking for the perfect one either. I just want to be good enough for someone and for someone to be good enough for me and let's just be happy. I'm so pathetic that I'm so angry at myself. Help! I need a sign, to stay or to move on, really. Why are you so capricious? It's enough to have an eccentric one, we don't need two. Now waking up is hard to do And sleeping's impossible, too Everything is reminding me of you What can I do? Say the word that you say Maybe we're better off this way I'm not fine, I'm in pain It's harder everyday Maybe we're better off this way It's better that we break God bless us all with not the right answers, but the best outcomes. Amen. Labels: 2012, happiness, love, maroon 5, relationships June
Sunday, July 1, 2012 • 2:47 PM • 0 comments
Caught Jason Mraz at the newly opened Gardens by the Bay on Friday. Although it was as happening as
I thought it would be, it was still good music, good fun, good company.
I have never realised how emo-nemo his songs were until that night.
 Finally I'm relieved of my MES duties on 23rd June. 4 gorgeous ladies are the new Queens. I'll continue to go green though. Always did because I have always felt guilty for wasting things. Like I've always said, "Every little green action counts!" Sigh, I'd love to be in another pageant but I guess I'm over-aged. Gosh! People always wonder why I join pageants. Well, the first thing that comes to my mind is dressing up! Asking me to put on full makeup, fake lashes, walk gracefully everyday is not gonna happen but i like that idea once in awhile and what better time to do it than during beauty contests. We get made up by professionals, hair blown, beautiful dresses, make friends with other gorgeous ladies. I like that. I like proving stereotypes wrong too. I think beautiful people who join beauty contests do not necessarily make them bimbos or lowly/poorly educated. Many of us are well educated, well groomed, confident and articulated ladies. =) And so, joining pageant has become my interest. Of course, it is not my ONLY interest. MES has been one of the more enjoyable ones because contestants are really nice people and made good friends. I remember one of the pageants I joined left an unpleasant aftertaste though. The winner had allegedly bought her titles.The winner and the organisation should feel guilty and ashamed. Oh well. Adds to the experience of joining pageants. =D  Finally, my favorite part of June was my West Coast trip to LA, SF, Vegas and Canyon. It was a great experience driving long distances, comfortable silences, beautiful landscapes and buildings, friendly animals and people, amazing food and great weather. I got too tanned for my liking and that's not so nice though. Lots of shopping, Coach, Kate Spade, Tiffany's, Tods, etc. Watched Temper Trap. Went Disneyland in LA!!! Took hotair balloon. Went wineries. Gambled in Vegas. Watched Cirque de Soleil. Venice Beach was pleasantly pretty. There were some bumps along the way but overall, i think it was enjoyable. Can't wait to go the East Coast like NYC or Washington next trip!       I can feel all my emotional baggage weighing on me. Many of my girl friends are hitched this year but there are long term relationships like more than 4 years, that have crumbled and failed. It's really quite sad but I'm sure they will move on. Whether it was a good choice or not, only time will tell. Like a friend mentioned yesterday, "Everytime I attend a wedding, it's a happy scene but I'm really fighting a mini-crisis inside me". Totally understand! I'm gonna hang in there and hold out for a year. I must tell myself that that's all it's worth waiting for, a year. I want to find someone whom I love, who has wit and humour, who is emotionally and financially secured, who makes me happy, who is willing to look past my flaws and is patient and kind to me, appreciate my strengths and encourage me, love me and care for me because he wants to and sees me as a life partner in sickness and in health, in richness and in poor, for all our lives together. All together now... Awwww... so God bless us all. Amen. Labels: 2012, california, emo, happiness, health, jason mraz, love, MES 2011, relationships, USA Relented.
Monday, April 9, 2012 • 2:22 PM • 0 comments There we go again and hopefully all the way...?God bless everyone. Happy Easter! :) Labels: 2012, boyfriend, couple, life, love And so it is, just like you said it would be
Saturday, March 31, 2012 • 4:46 PM • 0 comments After almost 7 months of great ups and downs, we're done.With every relationship, as I put in greater hopes and efforts, the more hurt and disappointments. I loved. I'm tired. I knew better but it's hard to explain. Like a moth to the fire, I've been burnt. God I can only pray and hope for glad tidings. Love, happiness and health. Amen. Labels: 2012, damien rice, emo, life, love |
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